If I Hear This Song Again...

This song may already be past it's prime considering the fact that the song was released last winter.  But if I hear "Grenade" by Bruno Mars one more time, I will be the one throwing the grenade at him...I'd rather not say.  I need to correct the statement concerning my allergies.  Not only am I allergic to raw carrots, but I am also allergic to THIS song.

Now if you read my blog previously, you will notice that last week I posted about his song "Just the Way You Are" and how much I love it.  (Click here to read that one!)  However, the basis on which that song was written is more delicate...or understandable than that of "Grenade."  Bruno (I guess I can call him by his first name) is basically admitting that he will die for this girl that couldn't care less about him. What about that makes any sense?

Okay, I realize that there are some many girls out there who think this is just the sweetest gesture a guy could ever do for a girl---risk his life.  But to me, all I am getting out of this song is that Bruno's relationship with this girl is distorted to the point that he can't even think straight.  I picture this girl taking advantage of his undying love for her by drawing him in just so she can have her own personal superman at her side at times of trouble.  I don't know, maybe this is what Bruno wanted the song to do, well not the "make him look completely oblivious" part, but quite possibly he wanted this song to spark up conversation.  If this is true, it certainly produced conversations, but also pictures!

This is what happens when oxidation and reduction
equations in Chemistry class don't really appeal to sophomores.

Alright, so basically we drew the cartoon layout for the song.  We have Bruno's supposed love interest on  the right with a dog (reference to the show Word World, yes...I watch PBS occasionally).  On the left you can see a murderer/skier/assassin who has just thrown a grenade at said girlfriend.  Now, parachuting in to "save the day" is Bruno Mars, who literally "catches" the grenade.  And the crabs, yes, not only did the murderer/skier/assassin give the lover girl a grenade, but also an STD.  Honestly, crabs are the only thing I can really draw well, so I put them in the picture too!

Why Can't I Pull Through?

I turned 16 in February, I got my permit last year around this time, but still cannot master the skill of driving. Well, the driving part is okay...it's the parking.

I went to RacketMan today to try out another racket, and finally decided on one. Of course my mom wanted me to drive. Wait, let me explain to you my mother's thoughts on my driving.

Mother: You need to get your license. I can't drive you everywhere, I don't do anything for me anymore. We go here, and then Saturday mornings we go to bowling. I'm sick of "we".

So now I have to drive everywhere, which isn't even that much because I don't go to a lot of places. My mother still finds random places for me to drive to anyway.  So back to what this post was originally about: Parking. We pulled into the Goodwill parking lot (my mother just can't go to one store when we're out) and I see a perfectly fine parking spot about half way down an aisle, one that I could pull through. But NO!!! My mom doesn't want to walk that far in the hot heat, it was pretty hot, so I pull into a parking spot towards the front. I have no problem pulling into a spot, it's the backing out part that I fail at. 

What seems to be an hour later, my mother is finally ready to go. I get in the car, put on my seat belt (safety first) turn on the engine, and put the car in reverse. Now I'm pretty sure that I looked both ways before pulling out, but this black car started blowing his horn at me. I turn around and I'm about 3 inches from hitting the side of his car. You know when people say "he came out of nowhere"? This guy really did.
And I conclude with this question readers; Why can't I just pull through? Is it really going to hurt anyone?

"...And It Was All Yellow"

Okay, so I gave the title away.  The artist is still unknown, unless you know, but how would we know if you know unless you COMMENT below (that rhymed)!

Along with the EOS products I purchased last week, I also got some Starbursts Original from Walgreens (on sale of course).  My main problem with the original flavors of Starbursts is that they do not follow the public's opinion.  Out of the four flavors, cherry, orange, lemon, and strawberry, lemon is obviously the least liked flavor.  Normally, the bags are so disproportionate that the lemon count is unbearable.  I have experienced this plenty of times in the past and decided to document this by opening a fresh bag and tallying the amount of Starbursts of each flavor.  I sorted them and gave them numbers...it was kind of fun.  

Yes.  I really did.

Unfortunately, my great theory that the factory producers put no consideration into the percentage of each flavor placed into each bag does not hold true for this test subject. But, I still found something that could be improved. In my opinion, the likability for the original flavor of Starbursts is as follows: strawberry, cherry, orange, and lemon at. the. very. end.  As the data shows, lemon takes up 31% (I had to add some math in order to convince myself I was doing something productive).  But 31%, that's almost 2/3 *fraction alert*.  That's really uncalled for, it's the worst flavor in my opinion.  Even my favorite flavor comes in third with 25%.  In a perfect bag of Starbursts, this would be a great percentage, encouraged actually.  But nothing is perfect =[  However, is it too much to ask the people behind Starbursts to slip a few more of the strawberries and lose a couple of the lemons here and there?  

Do you agree?  Which flavor do you like the most?  I won't judge...but I might smirk.

"I Click to MTV..."

"...so they can teach me how dougie" I know you know the name of this song.  Comment below =]

Alright, so I'm downstairs sitting at the kitchen table waiting for the microwave to go off signaling that my queso dip is ready.  I think to myself "hmm, I think I want to watch t.v. while eating my queso dip" (I actually say this out loud, I talk to myself a lot, I am right now, as I'm writing this blog)

So anyway, I do just like the song says, "I click to MTV" to see what's up.  And what do you know?  It's an episode of True Life that's talking about food allergies.    I then say to myself, "do I really want to watch this, I only have one food allergy, and it's a raw carrot allergy" (scientifically called: oral allergy syndrome (Wikipedia Article) where I'm only allergic to raw carrots).  So anyway, I watch it. And I'm not kidding about this next part, but the guy that they're following is allergic to carrots...and only raw ones!

  can't. breathe. throat. closing.

Ahhh! Much better =]

First of all, why would anyone be interested in watching a documentary about teens with allergies? I have no clue.  But second of all, I can't believe this coincidence.  You know those conversations teachers have right before a class party?

Example...
Teacher: Do any of you have food allergies?
Me: I do, I'm allergic to raw carrots.
Teacher: Okay...sure.   And what about cooked carrots? *says in humorous tone*
Me: Oh, those are fine.  I'm only allergic when they are raw.  See there's a substance that cooks out of the carrot when it's being sauteed...*and I continue with the full explanation of my allergy*
Teacher: Alright then.......anyone else?

I'm telling you, don't shut down someone's allergy just because it's absurd...maybe that's why True Life needed an episode about allergies.  Hmm...

What iz u tryna say?

This summer I have to read The Adventures of Huckleberry Finn by Mark Twain.  Let's just say this book is hard to read because of the dialect in which it was written.  Because of this, I have decided to investigate different dialects people use through text.  

Online chat language 101:

U kno wen u got dem ppl who type on da computer da way dey actually type in real life?  i just cant stand understand dem ppl. it dont make no sense whatchu even saying n u causing ppl to stress ova tyrna read ur posts.  I mean, what iz u tyrna say?

WHAT ABOUT THOSE PEOPLE WHO TALK IN ALL CAPS?  STOP!  IT'S LIKE YOU ARE YELLING AT US.  AND WE DIDN'T DO ANYTHING TO DESERVE THAT.  EITHER YOUR CAPS LOCK BUTTON IS STUCK, OR YOU HAVE ANGER MANAGEMENT ISSUES.  I MEAN, WHAT ARE YOU TRYING TO SAY?

and then we have the people that dont use any punctuation at all id take the overly punctual people over these people any day of the week you dont know where to end a sentence you dont know where the sentence starts if its a question or if its an exclamation i already dont like reading a whole bunch of words in a row and your lack of punctuation just makes it difficult to understand i mean what are you trying to say

But Then There Are Those People Who Capitalize Every Single Word In The Sentence?  Where Were You During First Grade When We Learned About Grammar and Sentence Structure?  But I Have Arrived At A Sensible Conclusion, You All Are Just Really Punctual People.  You Know...Those People Who Over Pronounce Every Word and Every Letter of Every Word.  I Mean, At Least We Know What You Are Trying To Say.

Fellow beings, let's get our act together.  They say we need to communicate more, so let's.  But talk in a way so that people can understand what you mean without them feeling like an idiot when it takes them 10 minutes to read one sentence.

Comment if YOU know what I'm trying to say!!!